A Glittastrophe

Wednesday, April 18, 2018

Parenting the first child did not prepare me for parenting the second child. Charlie will be three in August and I still haven’t gotten the hang of TWO. You see, Beckett was not a mischievous child. I mean, yeah - he ate dog food no matter how much real food I fed him... but other than that, it was a pretty straightforward situation we had going. I would say, “markers are for paper.” And then he colored ONLY on paper. Isn’t that how that’s supposed to work? Charlie disagrees. She seems to think tables and floors and brand new white Apple Keyboards make a fantastic canvas for markers - especially permanent black ones. And yesterday when I said, “glitter is only for mommies” she verbally agreed (I even got a “yes, ma’am”), but this morning I came down to the most exploded sparkle situation you have ever experienced. Yes, this is a dust pan full of glitter.

So what happened was: yesterday I crafted for Nicole’s upcoming bachelorette cruise (wooo!) but wasn’t even close to done with my to-make list, so I left the supplies on the table so I could finish today. Don’t worry - I obviously told the kids not to touch.

I want you to imagine my face right now. Present Day Me is looking at Yesterday Me like I’m a total idiot. DENISE. YOU ARE NOT A ROOKIE. GET IT TOGETHER.

The house is covered in glitter. Two children and two dogs have made it their mission to track it everywhere. It’s in every room upstairs and down. In my large floor rug. On the dog beds. On my bookshelves!

I’ve quarantined the children to their rooms and have been periodically vacuuming the bottom of my feet in a vain attempt to minimize the dispersion. Four hours of cleaning and I’ve decided to embrace it. Our new family motto will be, “Leave a little sparkle wherever you go.”

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